I was browsing through last evening and stumbled upon an article about a rapist's exclusive termed as a documentary and some excerpts of it and was stunned!
As usual when something shocking comes through my brain does like to shut it off, and like a child scared to enter a dark room i don't want to think of it. By this i mean -- "it will go away if i don't think of it" that's my mechanism of coping i suppose.
So i shut it off and let it be, literally sleeping over it and then i got a wats app message from a close friend and she wanted me to know so had sent me the link to it. I woke up to it and went by with the daily chores but could not stop the nagging feeling. Like other women folks i read the article previously where the hideous details of the Nirbhaya case had been mentioned when it happened on December 2012. Now the reason i say women folks is because this is an issue surrounding us and only "WE" can actually feel the horror!
i flicked through the channels and went to Times Now and kept watching the news hour debate and kept feeling outraged like having a very high blood pressure. Also there was no one at home and i couldn't control my own emotions even while i belted out some messages to friends and stuff it felt like i was getting suffocated with my own thoughts and hence pouring it out here.
One channel wants to broadcast the view the other wants to question the same, one woman activist wants to talk about the broadcasting ministry and its role in this and another wants to talk about the legal system which is faulty and so on. I Agree they are all making valid points but am stunned to read that the lawyer who is fighting the nirbhaya case said something along the lines of - the women in their family wont step out after a certain time of dark!
These misogynist pigs need women in all aspects of their life and yet these are the dark thoughts they have i daresay thats only the tip of it! Now the crime itself was brutal and then we had to put up with all the delayed tracking of the criminals and then the case and then this horrible excerpt of an interview with the criminal and then the lawyer's opinion -- How much more ? This isnt the first this isnt the last there are gonna be a lot more of similar situations following and it makes me very scared for the next generation of girls.
Very long back i was having a casual talk with my mother and i had asked her if she cried because she had a baby girl since her health dint permit for another offspring. She said - "Was thrilled to hold you alright, but i did cry for another girl born into a world where she will be ill treated because she is a girl not now but may be later... some day". I thought she was being ridiculous but later i wanted to prove to her that i would grow up to be as strong a woman as possible and make her proud. I did it to some extent though but i recall her thoughts and cant help but feel the same all over again after so many years -- I fear for the same thing!
At one point of time i used to think its the uneducated class who come up with this sort of thoughts and soon that curtain was pulled too. Education, caste, creed, language, status none of it has to do anything at all with this mindset may be. For this mindset starts right from the moment a baby girl is born! The distinguish starts at-- what sort of games a girl can and cannot play for if she picks up a ball to play with friends then she is called weird in so many words in all languages and the discrimination proceeds to studies, household chores, marriage and even death! Am sure for many of us born in the 80's into decent sensible families, life hasn't been very cruel but i really dont want to imagine the life of those Firsts! The first lady police officer, the first lady doctor, the first lady engineer to the first lady post woman and the first lady bus conductor...nope dont even want to think about the torture that those women might have gone through.
After all these years the issue still lies on women for we were wrong in going out for a job, for wanting to study further for wanting to achieve and for wanting to exist! Women should do house chores perfectly well, should be able to bear a child, should be able to earn some income should be able to do so many things and yet should be able to be home before its dark out and should be able to cover herself well and should be able to get killed the way they are! And yet its not enough! There is more expected of us. Men who fathered the female foetus wanted them killed for their own reasons and today the ratio of a girl child is stumbling off and hence there is a shortage of girls and yet again they are being sold for money to get married to because the same "MEN" aren't able to find women to get married to!
No amount of changes in the legal and other systems will be enough for the crime being committed on women. She is weird if she plays with a bunch of boys her age, she is cheap if she dresses up and goes to work and earns a salary, she is disgusting if she hangs around with men, she is not a good wife if she cant manage house hold, she is called different stuff for not bearing a child and the list is too long.... it goes on...
But inspite of being tortured to death and all the hideous things following the Nirbhaya case we still haven't done anything about it as a nation which is other than feeding those criminals and letting them make these statements which are so sick that there cannot be a psychologic explanation to it!
I cant even say RIP Nirbhaya because that cannot be!
As usual when something shocking comes through my brain does like to shut it off, and like a child scared to enter a dark room i don't want to think of it. By this i mean -- "it will go away if i don't think of it" that's my mechanism of coping i suppose.
So i shut it off and let it be, literally sleeping over it and then i got a wats app message from a close friend and she wanted me to know so had sent me the link to it. I woke up to it and went by with the daily chores but could not stop the nagging feeling. Like other women folks i read the article previously where the hideous details of the Nirbhaya case had been mentioned when it happened on December 2012. Now the reason i say women folks is because this is an issue surrounding us and only "WE" can actually feel the horror!
i flicked through the channels and went to Times Now and kept watching the news hour debate and kept feeling outraged like having a very high blood pressure. Also there was no one at home and i couldn't control my own emotions even while i belted out some messages to friends and stuff it felt like i was getting suffocated with my own thoughts and hence pouring it out here.
One channel wants to broadcast the view the other wants to question the same, one woman activist wants to talk about the broadcasting ministry and its role in this and another wants to talk about the legal system which is faulty and so on. I Agree they are all making valid points but am stunned to read that the lawyer who is fighting the nirbhaya case said something along the lines of - the women in their family wont step out after a certain time of dark!
These misogynist pigs need women in all aspects of their life and yet these are the dark thoughts they have i daresay thats only the tip of it! Now the crime itself was brutal and then we had to put up with all the delayed tracking of the criminals and then the case and then this horrible excerpt of an interview with the criminal and then the lawyer's opinion -- How much more ? This isnt the first this isnt the last there are gonna be a lot more of similar situations following and it makes me very scared for the next generation of girls.
Very long back i was having a casual talk with my mother and i had asked her if she cried because she had a baby girl since her health dint permit for another offspring. She said - "Was thrilled to hold you alright, but i did cry for another girl born into a world where she will be ill treated because she is a girl not now but may be later... some day". I thought she was being ridiculous but later i wanted to prove to her that i would grow up to be as strong a woman as possible and make her proud. I did it to some extent though but i recall her thoughts and cant help but feel the same all over again after so many years -- I fear for the same thing!
At one point of time i used to think its the uneducated class who come up with this sort of thoughts and soon that curtain was pulled too. Education, caste, creed, language, status none of it has to do anything at all with this mindset may be. For this mindset starts right from the moment a baby girl is born! The distinguish starts at-- what sort of games a girl can and cannot play for if she picks up a ball to play with friends then she is called weird in so many words in all languages and the discrimination proceeds to studies, household chores, marriage and even death! Am sure for many of us born in the 80's into decent sensible families, life hasn't been very cruel but i really dont want to imagine the life of those Firsts! The first lady police officer, the first lady doctor, the first lady engineer to the first lady post woman and the first lady bus conductor...nope dont even want to think about the torture that those women might have gone through.
After all these years the issue still lies on women for we were wrong in going out for a job, for wanting to study further for wanting to achieve and for wanting to exist! Women should do house chores perfectly well, should be able to bear a child, should be able to earn some income should be able to do so many things and yet should be able to be home before its dark out and should be able to cover herself well and should be able to get killed the way they are! And yet its not enough! There is more expected of us. Men who fathered the female foetus wanted them killed for their own reasons and today the ratio of a girl child is stumbling off and hence there is a shortage of girls and yet again they are being sold for money to get married to because the same "MEN" aren't able to find women to get married to!
No amount of changes in the legal and other systems will be enough for the crime being committed on women. She is weird if she plays with a bunch of boys her age, she is cheap if she dresses up and goes to work and earns a salary, she is disgusting if she hangs around with men, she is not a good wife if she cant manage house hold, she is called different stuff for not bearing a child and the list is too long.... it goes on...
But inspite of being tortured to death and all the hideous things following the Nirbhaya case we still haven't done anything about it as a nation which is other than feeding those criminals and letting them make these statements which are so sick that there cannot be a psychologic explanation to it!
I cant even say RIP Nirbhaya because that cannot be!
